Holiday Party FAIL

Well, I don’t know that it was exactly a holiday party fail, really, but yesterday was what I would consider a fail.

*Warning, the following contains a lot of talk about food.  Some of it was kind of naughty.  If that is going to be a problem for you, I suggest you go on to the next blog 😉

This week I have been doing pretty good.  Friday I had a date with my 5 year old for lunch.  I like to pull my kids out of school once in a while for a lunch date, and Friday was her day.  I took her to McD’s (her choice, plus it’s like the only thing close by) and I had what she was having – a happy meal.  It fit in with my calories, plus I worked out really hard that day.  I was happy with my choice.

Saturday we were meeting Hubster’s parents in another town that is about halfway between our town and theirs for his birthday.  They wanted to go to….McD’s.  Fine.  I did the same thing as on Friday.  I ate sparingly at breakfast and dinner, no snacks, etc.  That time I ordered the meal with 2 cheeseburgers.  I took one of the cheeseburgers and a small handful of fries and gave the rest to Hubs…so essentially we split the 2 cheeseburger meal but he got the majority of the fries.  We also shared a small egg nog shake.  Still not bad.  Still fit into my calories.

Yesterday (sunday) things went a little haywire.  It was Hubster’s actual birthday and he requested that I make eggs, hashbrowns, and sausage.  No biggie.  I made it and carefully portioned out my plate.  It wasn’t too bad but I felt like I would need to watch lunch and dinner carefully because I knew I was also going to this holiday party thing.

For lunch I had a few ounces of leftover pot roast.  I knew we were having chili for dinner which is pretty low cal, so I felt good about it all, and I knew I could handle myself at the party.  Then the afternoon munchies struck.  I had snacks.  It was nothing earth shattering.  I didn’t sit down and eat a block of cheese or an entire bag of chips…it’s more the fact that I wasn’t even hungry that bothers me.  Then at dinner, I had intended to eat my chili without the few Fritos we usually put in the bottom..but Hubs had already put my bowl together and I didn’t want to make a fuss…so I ate them.  Again, this wouldn’t have been a problem if it wasn’t for the munchies.

Then the party.  I had pretty much eaten an amount of calories that is roughly equal to maintenance at my goal weight (180, will evaluate that again when I get there) so I knew I was still pretty much okay.  I brought a dessert to share and I wanted to try it since I’d never made it before and I was a little worried I might have messed it up.  So I tried it…and thought it wouldn’t hurt if I had just a couple of those meatballs that looked so good…and a tiny spoonful of the pasta salad.  That was all I ate, but I feel bad about it.  It wasn’t enough to throw me into chaos, it wasn’t enough to cause a gain.  I just am being hard on myself because I knew all day this party was coming and I knew that if I wanted to sample something there I would need to keep the eating at home in check.  But I ate my day’s worth of calories before I even got there and sampled anyway.  It wasn’t that much, but it made me feel bad.  Truthfully, I had planned on throwing a slightly higher calorie day in soon anyway…but I didn’t want it to happen like that.  I wanted to have it planned out.  I will do it *this* day and *this* is what I will have.

No damage done scale-wise.  I’m thankful for that because that really helped me pick myself up this morning.  I know that thin people can have a day where they have a few snacks and they just eat normally again the next day.  No freaking out required.  I got up this morning and felt very calm about it.  Not calm as in “well, I’ve blown it!” but calm as in “It’s okay, today will be fine.”  I feel better today.  I’m glad a “major binge” for me is a couple of meatballs and a piece of dessert that put my over my maintenance calories for a weight that is FAR below my actual weight.  It could have been much, much worse.  It’s not a victory by any means, but it doesn’t make me feel like quitting.

Hubster offered to let me take 2 of the kids out to dinner tonight after Kid1’s Cub Scout ice skating party, and I declined.  I don’t think I have EVER declined to go out to dinner.  I love going out to eat and not cooking!  The fact is though that I’ve been to McD’s twice this week already and I think Wednesday we had chinese so I don’t think I need to go out to eat again.  Oh the ice skating party….there is going to be candy and cookies and hot chocolate there.  The way I figure it, I’ve played my “holiday party goof” card already so no passes tonight.  I’m planning on not having anything at all.  I’m kind of losing my taste for sweets anyway.  I am going to be totally fine and I’m looking forward to staring this party in the face and not flinching.

(I’m not really sure if I am the cat or the mouse in this instance…it works both ways really…which do you think, and why?)


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Karen Ogle
    Dec 20, 2010 @ 12:24:35

    Good luck at the party tonight. At this point, with me going up and down, I’m just avoiding all social functions where there may be choices that tempt me too much. I do much better eating at home because I have more control. I try not to keep junk in the house, but I did give in last night and asked Dail to pick up some Lorna Doon shortbread cookies. He got small packets and so now they ar gone, thank goodness. It was a small indulgence but still unhealthy and I feel bad about it. Still, this is another day and another opportunity to prove to myself that I CAN stick to the plan and have another good weigh in next week.
    You can too!


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